Saturday, May 3, 2014

I have to find a way to de-stress!!!

Roughly about a week now, I have taken to walking or jogging for 30 to 45 minutes after I get home from work. My Physiatrist recommended that I do it every other day so I don't strain myself too much since I'm a newbie in this. I won't give up what I've started though. I love walking but this is the first time I started a routine. The 30 minutes to 45 minutes I go around my neighborhood at around 6am is very precious. I work at night from 8pm to 5am and any work related stress that I go through is magnified by the fact that I work on the graveyard shift. My circadian clock and my work hours have constantly been at odds with each other for almost 6 years and I noticed a lot of changes in my my body and my well being. I know that I'm at a certain point in my life that I should know better; so exercise and a healthy diet should be my main focus. It took walking/jogging for a different reason though. When I'm walking it's my time to clear my head of any thoughts and worries. I can choose to just think of moving forward and which turn to take and all the other worries just fade. No matter how hectic my workday was I get to have this alone time and it is saving me from insanity. Since November 2013 playing two different job funtions at work certainly has its toll. It's no longer about long work hours, it's long work hours with varied focus on each role. There are a lot more deliverables and the pressure to perform well on both has had me at my wit's end. I almost wanted to throw my hat in the ring last April 2014 but a part of me can't give up. I needed a stress reliever fast. I can't help but think that maybe Fr. Robert Reyes was right when he told us about the spirituality of running. There's something in that will to move forward and learning to choose the routes that seems almost philosophical and spiritual. My morning ritual although fairly new has had some effect. I know part of it are endorphins but mostly the bit of time that I get a breather from all of it and it's such a welcome respite. When running, jogging, or walking alone it's an opportunity to have those conversations with one's self or even time to pray to God. The sound of that pounding on the pavement everytime one's feet hits the ground is almost like repetitive prayer, it becomes relaxing. My only hope is that I can sustain the routine.