Thursday, August 2, 2007

birthday blues

so much for mellowing and less drama on the verge of my birthday. i woke up the day before my birthday feeling drowsy, the whole room spinning before me and sweating profusely. i thought i was dying, see the drama forming in my head right away. i spent the entire day dozing on and off, complaining about how bad i feel. my mom didn't even bother to ask me whether i want to go to the e.r. she just said that it's normal for me to feel down or low as my birthday is near. the moment she said that i felt like she aced how i felt exactly. i had a suspicion that whatever physical pain i am going through was psychosomatic, i am just having another anxiety attack. this one much worse than previous years and this one didn't go on weeks before but on the day before. not as excruciating by dragging the sinking feeling of getting a year older at a longer span of time but this one took me by surprise as it was very physically painful.